I’ll also have you know that when it comes to America’s sandwiches, there’s the Whopper, which has five different variations. The classic Whopper Sandwich, the Double Whopper Sandwich, the Triple Whopper Sandwich, the Whopper Jr. Sandwich, or the all-new Carolina BBQ Whopper Sandwich.
And it’s not enough.
You mean to tell me that none of those Camrys are available as a coupe? And only one of the Whoppers comes with bacon? Socalist idiots.
Oh you laugh, but it’s election season! And in this time of year, you’ll swear with certainty that whoever isn’t voting for your guy must be a dumbass. Are you sure it’s not you? Hell, we have more options on the X-Factor than we do in our political system – a system that allegedly controls the future of our country. But we love bashing each other too much to let it get in the way of rational discourse. And most of us don’t even know why – we’re either a Republican or a Democrat; to hell with everyone else!
What’s scarier – the politicians, or you?
From a Facebooker’s – err, outsider’s – perspective, it seems like we’re far more concerned with insulting each other than knowing what it is we’re talking about. Instead, we should be making fun of ourselves for falling for the ‘joke’ of a two-party system. And for allowing our misguided political affiliations to supersede the basic question – is this really the best we can do? I mean, we put a man on the moon. You mean to tell me we can’t have at least three viable parties to pick from? And don’t give me that whole ‘independent’ or ‘green’ party argument. I mean a structured system that gives us structured, supported options.
Just to prove how out of wack our priorities are, I’ve compiled an informal list of five things we should care about way more than our political affiliations – but don’t. And it should make us feel so ashamed.
1. Our own health.
2. Holding doors open for other humans and saying ‘thank you.’
3. Sick children.
4. The environment.
5. Homeless people.
Vote. Or don’t vote. At this point, we can’t just blindly assume that because we show up at the polls that we’re doing the right thing. Until we let the vice grip off of our respective parties, we’re as screwed up as they are.
David Berry is a Miami-based copywriter who has delivered writing solutions for a wide set of clients with a diverse range of needs. From books (fiction and non-fiction) to blogs, feature stories and everything else in between, he’s written for restaurants and retail clients, hotel chains, cosmetics companies, universities and more, as well as magazines, Fortune 500 companies and numerous entrepreneurs.
Berry has an MBA from Florida International University and draws passion for his craft from a wide base of interests, as he’s also a NASM certified personal trainer, former stand-up comedian, and volunteer, having won Miami Children’s Hospital’s 2011 Volunteer of the Year award while raising more than $100,000 for the hospital’s Radio Lollipop program.