I’ve got a newsflash for all of you married, commitment-honoring men out there - “Monogomy [is] a theory/fantasy attained solely by men without options and even less self-confidence.”  I know this probably comes as a shock to you.  But at least we can finally put to bed that terrible lie about monogomy being perhaps the largest unspoken statement of love that you can make to another human being.  Instead, it turns out you’re just a loser who can’t pull more ass.

That quote didn’t come from some obscure news site, by the way.  It came from prominant national sports writer, Jason Whitlock, in an article he wrote for MSN.com last week (yes, the same MSN that’s owned by the uber-conservative Fox network.)  Check it out here. Now before I get going on this one, I’ll first say that I’m no angel.  Just like any other man or woman, I believe that monogomy is a tough proposition that isn’t achieved with ease.  It involves constantly feeding your thirsty relationship with care, attention and trust.  Oddly enough, that also sounds a lot like this purported “love” that some people claim to have experienced, but I can’t say for sure.

But then the rumors started.  Like, maybe this whole monogomy thing isn’t as good as it’s cracked up to be.  Relationships?  We like those.  But sex with one person?  We can do without that. 

Maybe I sound old and preachy, but I don’t give a shit.  The reason this conversation is even taken seriously is because of a socially Liberal movement that believes standing for nothing in particular makes you “tolerant” and that all who oppose you are narrow minded bigots.  That’s bullshit.

“Sexual empowerment” and “sexual promiscuity” are not synonyms, no matter how much we wish they were.  Sexual empowerment, by its very name, shows that sex has power.   There’s power in choosing to remain monogomous because it takes effort and strength; hence “power.” I don’t see any “power” in boning a ton of chicks simply because it’s possible.  The only strength that involves is the ability to get another chub in time for the next one.  (Although that can be difficult, but I digress.)

I don’t have a problem with promiscuity.  The moralist in me wishes that weren’t true, but I know better.  What I do have a problem with is broken commitments. You can’t separate the girl from her vagina in the context of a relationship.  If you want her, you take her vagina too, for better or worse.  If all you want is the vagina, then leave the relationship at the door.  It’s that simple. 

Let’s stop making excuses for ourselves.