On my drive home from the grocery store, I had a moment when the 16 year old version of me appeared out of nowhere, made a brief cameo and seemed, well, kind of impressed by the newly-minted 29-year-old version of me. I had just purchased groceries for myself with my own money, leaving the store at 9:30 p.m. without having to explain to my parents where I’d been. Then, I put the bags in my […]

A 16 Year Old Turns 29

*Dedicated to someone who may or may not be starting a clothing line.* PROOF THAT GOD HAS A SENSE OF HUMOR: 365 days in your own city. Number of people you meet who you’re really interested in? Zero. 3 days in another city? You’re freaking in love with that one guy you met. For starters, consider the irony that you’re interacting with single men and women on a daily basis and you’d rather go to CrossFit […]

Long Distance Love

*For the second time in four months, I will watch one of my ‘baby’ cousins get married. This is what I’ll be sharing at her wedding tonight.* I haven’t decided yet if you and your sister getting married so close together is genuinely for true love, or just a cruel ploy to humiliate me in front of family members who know I’m older than both of you and still single. “David, when are you going […]

Speech! My Wedding Day Message to Kayla & Jason

Last week, I took part in a panel discussion that was unlikely for two reasons. 1. It was for the Brown University Alumni Association, and my educational pedigree is far from Ivy League. And 2. The panel was to discuss bi-racial dating issues and, well, I’m white. You see, when the topic of race ever comes into discussion, the thing that we all know but don’t often say is that “the opinion of white people […]

The Bi-Racial Dating Conundrum

I’ve gone on a few dates with a girl in the past couple of weeks. And no, the fact that I’ve made it past two dates with one girl isn’t the story here, although we can, in the near future, discuss how this is the first time in two years that I’ve made it past two dates. But I digress. You know how this dating thing goes. Around date three or four, or maybe sooner, sex somehow enters the conversation […]

What’s Your ‘Number’?

Don’t date a girl who cheated on a guy to be with you. If he doesn’t hold the door for you, give him the boot. Don’t date a guy who has a history of sleeping around. If he doesn’t honor the ‘two day rule,’ he’s too eager. Don’t hangout two days in a row within the first few weeks of dating and don’t do it at his apartment and don’t have sex and… Hold up. […]

The Rules are Broken

About six months ago, I did something out of character (mom, don’t read this!) – I met a girl out at a bar an imbibing establishment and took her back to my apartment. Or, more accurately, she left the establishment and followed me home. And since I’m a stand-up guy who hates to disappoint, I allowed her to accompany me back to my residence. Normally, I wouldn’t have done that. But I let her because […]

A Little Shop of Horrors – In My Bedroom

Always the insecure, validation-seeking mommy’s boy, I (half) jokingly asked my mother if she was proud of me the other day. “Of course I am, sweetheart,” she said. “I just hope you find somebody is all.” Which means “blah blah blah blah blah to all of the great things you just said, but you’re still single.” Ouch.

Dating Apathy

As recently as three or so years ago, the notion that I could date a mom still had an American Pie mental image attached to it. The assumption being, of course, that getting with a mom meant getting with a friend’s mom, which was more of a novelty than an actual option. (You’re safe, guys.) That is, until MILFs became part of a new demographic – late 20s, early 30s divorcees with a kid or […]

Dating a Mom