But did it have to be that way? Was there a moment in time where I could’ve steered it into more than friend zone if I had wanted to? Do I even have any control over that?
Ugh. So many questions, so much self-doubt. Interestingly enough, though, the first question isn’t any of the above. It’s ‘am I able to detect a level of interest from someone in the first place?’
The answer is two-fold: If you’re not interested in the person, it’s usually crystal clear if they’re into you or not. A clear-thinking mind knows the truth. But if you are interested in the person, then you almost immediately turn into an idiot and ignore all of the signs – good or bad. What a sad, sad irony.
Personally, I’m awful at this. I can sit around here and speak confidently about love’s ins and outs but couldn’t tell you if a girl who answers my texts, engages in conversation, etc. likes me or is just being polite. I can’t take a hint. Nevertheless, I’m going to take a stab at this one because, well, it’s my blog and that’s what I’m supposed to do.
To make my best effort, I’ve compiled an unofficial, incomplete list of things that should give you hope:
- They respond to texts/calls in a timely manner
- They initiate conversations (very good news!)
- They ask you questions
- They’re consistent
- They don’t mind occasional flirtations
- They’re as accommodating as you are
- They talk about potential plans outside of a week in advance
On the flip side, these are things that are probably dream killers:
- They frequently respond in less than 3 words
- They don’t ask questions
- They’re hot and cold
- They only contact you after 10pm
- They don’t give you access to weekends
- They have lots of pre-determined time constraints (this happens on occasion, but shouldn’t always be the case)
Look, this isn’t rocket science, and even I know that. But like I said, when your head is in the ‘is this love?’ clouds, your sense of logic doesn’t work too well. If you can answer these questions objectively, you’ll have your answer. Just be prepared for it to not be what you want it to be. And don’t screw it up if it is what you want it to be! More on that next time.
David Berry is a Miami-based copywriter who has delivered writing solutions for a wide set of clients with a diverse range of needs. From books (fiction and non-fiction) to blogs, feature stories and everything else in between, he’s written for restaurants and retail clients, hotel chains, cosmetics companies, universities and more, as well as magazines, Fortune 500 companies and numerous entrepreneurs.
Berry has an MBA from Florida International University and draws passion for his craft from a wide base of interests, as he’s also a NASM certified personal trainer, former stand-up comedian, and volunteer, having won Miami Children’s Hospital’s 2011 Volunteer of the Year award while raising more than $100,000 for the hospital’s Radio Lollipop program.